How to Catch a Cheater: Is your partner unfaithful?

(WFLA) – From strippers to porn stars, cheating spouses and their scandalous exploits have grabbed news headlines recently.

It’s a horrible, painful reality that many spouses don’t realize is happening. 

8 On Your Side has been exploring the slippery slope of infidelity, from a private investigator to a man who admits he cheats.

Cheaters aren’t hard to find. They flock to sites like Ashley Madison, even Craigslist, where WFLA found personal ad after personal ad, married men and women looking for a fling.

8 On Your Side reached out to these posters to see if any would share their naughty exploits. One man agreed, but he wouldn’t go on camera.

The man said he would only answer questions through an app like KIK or Snapchat, he said, because they are “untraceable and can be deleted.”

“It’s difficult to trace them, and one of the main reasons is they don’t sign up with their real name,” Alpha Agency Private Investigator Wayne Miles told 8 On Your Side. Miles said cheaters are keeping P.I.’s like him busy, both men and women equally.

Miles has a team of private investigators and an arsenal of tools to catch cheaters in the act.

“This is a high definition color digital camera, the lens is actually a little tiny hole right here,” Miles said as he showed an Aquafina water bottle that was actually a hidden camera. The device allows Miles to sit right next a cheater and watch every moment of their scandalous rendezvous.

Miles said his team creates fake social media accounts and utilizes a wide array of hidden cameras to capture cheaters who will go to extremes to hide a secret life.


The Craigslist poster agreed to share why he cheats. He said he’s been with his wife for 20 years and faithful for many. The man claimed he tried to talk to his wife about their lack of intimacy, but after years without any change and without his needs being met, he started cheating.

“Usually, when some of those needs aren’t being met, then that’s when you have some of the anger or contempt that might come out. If those needs aren’t being met, they are often not being discussed either within the marriage. So then you have that breakdown of communication, then you usually at that point could have somebody stray,” licensed psychologist Dr. Stacey McLaughlin said.

Dr. McLaughlin said couples can overcome cheating if both spouses come to the table.

“I see it all the time in my practice when individuals are ready to own their role in whatever happened to lead to this and also take a look at how to remake this marriage stronger,” she said.

Is your spouse cheating?

The Craigslist poster said he’s extra careful not to get caught. He has a secret email account and only communicates through apps that he can delete. He only uses cash for hotels and meals. Also, he said no one can wear perfume or cologne.

“Something that sometimes catches people off guard is the length of time that affairs can get hidden,” Dr. McLaughlin warned that there are some behavioral signs that should not be ignored.

“If there’s a lot of anger, some defensiveness, a lot of conflict in a relationship,” she said. “If there’s just a general disconnect from your partner.”

Here are some signs from Alpha Agency:

  • A new hair style or change in appearance.
  • Different types of clothing or dressing habits. This includes new underwear too.
  • Different perfume or after shave.
  • Cleaning out the car more often.
  • Sudden interest in diet and exercise.
  • A change in work hours or schedule.

All of these have been around for a long time, but still good things to look for. Let’s face it, in this modern computer age, it’s easier to sneak around and hide things. Watch for some of these activities if you have your doubts.

Cell Phones

  • Your partner suddenly gets a new phone or an additional phone not listed on the family account.
  • Your partner jumps when the phone rings.
  • You notice different ring tones than what you are used to.
  • Your partner has a new interest in text messages.
  • Your partner gets a call or message and starts to act nervous or has to run an errand shortly after.
  • Your partner keeps their cell phone in their hand more often, sits with it next to them or even takes it to the bathroom with them.

Personal Computer

  • Your partner rearranges the room so the screen can’t be seen from the doorway.
  • Your partner changes the screen quickly when you enter the room.
  • Your partner develops a need to wear headphones while surfing.
  • Your partner stays up later than normal to use the PC.
  • Your partner checks email several times a day.
  • Your partner puts a password on the home computer and keeps it to their self.
  • Your partner keeps files on a memory stick and keeps it in their possession or hides it.

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