To Have and Not to Hold is a new adoption memoir like no other. Lorri Antosz Benson was a young, single, driven television producer on the national stage. When she found herself unexpectedly pregnant she made the heartbreaking decision she thought best for her unborn daughter Aimee and placed her for adoption. The painful decision worsened when Lorri realized too late that the “final adoption” she had agreed to legally meant a closed adoption. No updates. No pictures. No contact. No future with Aimee.
Through Lorri’s personal account, letters, and photos To Have and Not to Hold shares the touching journey of one birth mother as she worked to open the door for communication without interfering with the family she helped create. What she never expected was what lay on the other side of that door—a soul connection with not just her daughter, but her daughter’s adoptive mom, a woman generous enough to share the impossible . . . motherhood. To Have and Not to Hold shows the deep bond of friendship and love between the two mothers—one gave the gift of life, hope, and family. The other shared everything she had for love of her child.